REVIEW: Unlucky Seven
Last December's Steel City Con I was making money I didn't know what to do with, but Steel City Con is mostly toys and celebrities, which aren't my thing. After paying to meet ASJ, there wasn't much else I wanted to buy. So I found one of those self published authors and took a $10 gamble on J. P. Bidula's Unlucky Seven.
Unlucky Seven opens in media res on an eerie scene after a mysterious tanker has crashed outside of a bar. A group of mid-20-somethings awaken to find themselves covered in black goo. They're taken off to some scary hospital and detoxed and cleansed. They sign a NDE and get a briefcase full of cash, told that everything was going to be okay. A few days later they all wake up with superpowers. Described by the author as Arrested Development meets the Avengers, Unlucky Seven is a dramedy about a bunch of geeks like us who are given superpowers and decided to embrace their happenstance and take to costumed the vigilante life. Meanwhile, the bad guys who created the black goo are up to their own bad guy shenanigans.
When something like this has a number in the title, you're naturally going to spend the first chapter or so counting every introduced character. Well there is about a dozen people caught up in the power granting accident and the initial "gang" is already more than seven. Some people go solo, others join the dark side, some get dumped. In the end a complete stranger becomes the seventh member of the team. It's definitely the kind of book that you need to keep a page of notes to keep the characters straight. But eventually it narrows down on the essential players in the second half. Another thing you may ask going into this book is who has what powers and how are they played with? Well the de facto main guy has fire power, but this includes his hair. He has burning hair, or rather he has flames where his hair should be. That might sound cool on paper, but could easily end up ridiculous on screen. There is also an ice girl. She also has ice for hair, but I can visualize it better in that she can control it and turn it into different styles and even helmets.
Other generic powers are presented. Telepathy, technopathy, etc. But they're all explored in unique ways. The telepath has no qualms with using her powers on anyone for any purpose, very First Class Xavier. And there is a lightning guy who can drain energy from batteries. And the multiple man creates disposable clones specifically for murder practice. Also you really get into the big rock guy's head. He doesn't get hungry or tired or even horny. He's just a rock, but he remembers what being a human is like. That's messed up. There's also this high school homecoming king sort of guy. He turns into Savage Dragon. That's awesome.
So while the plot floats between introducing new characters and slowly building them up as a heroic force, there is little in the way of fight scenes and action. That's kind of the point. These guys get comic book superpowers, but in the real world where there are no super villains. It feels very Kick-Ass in that regard, but I feel like the ending sets up a sequel a bit closer to Samurai Flamenco. J. P. Bidula is a great guy who created a cool story with funny characters. Unlucky Seven might not be as kick ass or imaginative as Shark Knights, but it's definitely funnier with superhero patrols going horribly wrong and powers being used to mentally abuse people. for fun. Unlucky Seven is just that, fun. It gives a group of geeks real powers, lets them build a secret base, and then gives them dick to do with it. So while there may only be one big superpower battle at the climax, it is definitely worth it in the end. My only actual criticism is of the way Amazon printed the cover. Maybe it's cause it's flat black, and Shark Knights is colored artwork, but human oils from my hand destroyed this book. Maybe it's 'cus I read it on a bus or something. Buy the book on Amazon here. For a limited time only you can get the Kindle version %100 free!
This is an updated version of an article that was originally published on 04/09/2015.
